How Big A Club Is Plymouth Argyle?

How do you judge the success, or otherwise, of a team or a manager? It's easy, for most teams, if you win something or get promoted then you are successful but is Liverpool FC currently successful? Is a League Cup good enough for them? It'd be an absolute triumph for Argyle that's for sure! It's still the same trophy though.

For Argyle, right now, the reverse logic applies. Sitting near the foot of the Football League is failure for Argyle but, at the same time, not getting relegated would be a triumph. It's a funny old and entirely subjective business and it all depends on who and what you are. Well judging how we are perceived by others is notoriously difficult so this is how I see Argyle, and in context everybody else too...

The League clubs are effectively split into an unwritten, until now that is, hierarchy. The relative place in that hierarchy is determined partly by history, partly by form and current league position and partly by whether I like them or not. In some cases I have used ground capacity to order teams that I really can't split. And it goes something like this:

Mega Clubs

To my mind these clubs are the nation's giants. It is these that should always be jostling for the major trophies. None of these should ever be outside the top division. Obviously it doesn't necessarily work out that way in practice.

Manchester United

Liverpool

Arsenal

Chelsea

Everton

Manchester City

Tottenham Hotspur

Aston Villa

Newcastle United

Leeds United

Sheffield Wednesday

Sunderland

West Ham United

Part Timers

The next batch desperately want to be a Mega Club but they just aren't. Not quite. They rarely win a major trophy, and hark on about it relentlessly when they do, but they are occasionally in with a shout until the near inevitable heartbreak is visited upon them (usually by a Mega Club).

Middlesbrough

Derby County

Southampton

Sheffield United

Coventry City

Leicester City

Wolverhampton Wanderers

Nottingham Forest

Ipswich Town

Blackburn Rovers

Birmingham City

Bolton Wanderers

Stoke City

Charlton Athletic

Norwich City

Cardiff City

West Bromwich Albion

Wannabes

These are the middling clubs. Football's true mediocrities with very little recent history of success, or extravagant failure, but perhaps there is some glory lurking there in the distant past. To misquote John Lennon for them "a part-timer is something to be".

Fulham Hull City Queens Park Rangers

Bradford City

Preston North End

Barnsley

Brighton & Hove Albion Crystal Palace

Burnley

Bristol City

Wigan Athletic

Huddersfield Town

Reading

Portsmouth

Swansea City

Notts County

Millwall

Port Vale

Carlisle United

Watford

Milton Keynes Dons

Sub-Wannabes

I think you can tell what I mean by that. They aspire to be Wannabes!

Milton Keynes Dons

Tranmere Rovers

Blackpool

Swindon Town

Peterborough United

Brentford

Oxford United

Southend United

Bristol Rovers

Doncaster Rovers

Gillingham Crewe Alexandra

No Hopers

This next batch might seem to be rather cruelly named. Once you see who they are you'll see why I've chosen them:

Bury

Walsall

Oldham Athletic

Northampton Town

Stockport County

Chesterfield

Rochdale

Colchester United

Rotherham United

Wycombe Wanderers

Shrewsbury Town

AFC Bournemouth

Leyton Orient

Scunthorpe United

Exeter City

Hartlepool United

Non-Leaguers

The next lot? For them just being in the Football League is a triumph. They exist to struggle relentlessly against the odds. For them relegation out of the Football League is not an unthinkable disaster but a very realistic prospect that they need to be ready for.

Yeovil Town

Cheltenham Town

Burton Albion

Aldershot Town

Stevenage

Morecambe

Dagenham & Redbridge

Barnet

Macclesfield Town

Torquay United

Hereford United

AFC Wimbledon

Crawley Town

You might have noticed that I have not included Argyle! Where would you put them?